Woman's Random Thoughts
- Insanity is my only means of relaxation.
- Reason to smile: Every 7 minutes of every day, someone in an aerobics classs pulls a hamstring.
- Women over 50 don't have babies because they would put them down and forget where they left them!
- One of life's mysteries is how a 2 pound box of candy can make a woman gain five pounds!
- My mind not only wanders, it sometime leaves completely.
- The best way to forget all your troubles is to wear tight shoes.
- The nice part about living in a small town is that when you don't know what you're doing, someone else does.
- The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight because by then your body and your fat are really good friends.
- Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along came today.
- Sometimes I think I understand everything, then I regain consciousness.
- I gave up jogging for my health when my thighs kept rubbing together and setting my pantihose on fire.
- Amazing you hang something in your closet for a while and it shrinks two sizes.
- The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing (and then they marry him).
- I read this article that said the typical symptoms of stress are eating too much, impulse buying, and driving too fast. Are they kidding? That's my idea of a perfect day.
